Monday, June 10, 2013

So you want to date a Surfer??

oh them surfer boysss
Let me tell you some things about being a surfer’s girlfriend before you delve into their world of sun, sea, and surf.

You see them at the beach all tanned and gorgeous; their toned arms carrying boards as the breeze blows at their rough sun-bleached surfer hair. Their lean athletic bodies look so sexy, natural, and daring, especially when you see them ripping at the waves and bravely charging sets and barrels.

Not to mention the lifestyle they lead: nature-loving travelers who are always up for the next adventure or off to the best surf locations, enjoying such carefree and fun lives.





Who wouldn’t be attracted to these laid-back risky specimens? They’re easy-going all right, but there’s a lot more to dating them.

Priority

I hope you’re not the clingy type because for these sea-loving creatures surfing will often if not always be first and relationships second. I also hope you don’t mind sharing because you will have to share your dude with the sport about 70-30. You being the 30. If you can swallow that bitter truth then you’ll be fine.

Don’t expect date nights or holidays elsewhere when there’s a swell because this is pretty much all they think about, eat, and prepare for like it’s the last swell before the world ends.

Girlfriends

And wait until he gets a new surfboard and it'll be the most important thing in his life. You may even come home to it lying on your bed.

Water wavelength

Speaking of sharing your guy, well, I hope you love the water too because you will be spending a whole lot of time in it. If he's not surfing, he's either fishing, snorkeling, diving or swimming and he will want you to come along. 

So if you’re scared of the ocean or of wearing swimwear or of something silly like getting dark, this may not be an ideal relationship because even if you’re not in the water, you would still definitely be somewhere near it.

Cranky Pants

Have you seen a shirtless dude pacing up and down complaining constantly about how “shitty” the waves have been, or one that’s helplessly staring off into the flat sea or at the forecasts online? That’s a surfer that hasn’t gone in the water for a couple of days.

You have to know and accept that they are a different breed of sportsmen. They are not your usual athletes that would be satisfied with an hour game of b-ball or a round of golf a few days a week. No. These guys have to surf A LOT because if they don’t, they get antsy. They get crabby enough you want to throw them into the water yourself!

Surfer’s Widow

You do know that these guys surf for hours right? Not just 2 or 3, we’re talking about 5,6,7 hours in a day, often doing a couple or more sessions!

Don’t worry, you will still see him -- when he comes in to eat or have a beer break in between sessions.

I hope you are cool with that and of being left at the beach alone, sometimes until past sundown when everybody else had gone home. And as you look up at the moon, you start thinking of every possible scary scenario that could have happened to your guy: perhaps he’s drowned and is floating off somewhere in the ocean or he’s been eaten by a shark…

And when you ask him later why he got in so late, he snaps back, “What do you mean? There’s still lots of other guys out there!”

Patience is indeed a virtue

I hope you won’t mind waking up alone because your guy has already gone out to 'dawn patrol'. 
Nor would you mind the constant surf texts between him and his buddies. 
How about getting asked to drive down the beach to bring his other board because the one he’s using snapped? 
And need I mention how irritable they get if you as much as blink when they’re hurrying to get to the surf?

Surf 24/7

Oh and it doesn’t get any easier and this is no exaggeration. These creatures live and breathe the surf. They dream about it too! They talk about the surf before and after surfing. Even at parties, they watch surf videos or photos -- endlessly.

Surf Shutterbug

You like taking photos? I hope so because you’ll be taking lots of your man surfing.

Travel

This is a possible perk unless you hate being on the motorbike or stuck in a car for hours as your dude goes on a wave hunt across the island or perhaps the continent.

Surfer Lingo

I sure hope you like learning languages because you will want to add surfer lingo into your repertoire. I tell you these guys barf and fart surf talk all day: “solid 6-8 foot, double - triple overhead, clean and glassy, onshore - offshore, wind directions, tides, sets, pumping, barreling, perfect tubes..…”

It’s like a Bill and Ted conversation, on repeat. You have to learn the language and everything associated with surfing if you want to understand him (and his buddies) and prevent yourself from wanting to slit your throat.

Tunnel Vision

You may also want to know that surfers suffer from a version of ‘tunnel vision syndrome’ caused by online surf reports. This is when your guy is religiously reading forecasts and reports like they're some sacred scripture, totally hypnotized, oblivious to the world. There could be an earthquake or a tsunami and he'd be uninterested. Maybe more to the latter because he'll consider surfing it. Crazy. But anyway, the point is, nothing can distract their intense concentration from what surfline or magicseaweed has to say.

Danger Factor

I hope you aren't squeamish at the sight of blood and injury since reef cuts, wounds, ear and staph infections, and various bodily injuries will all be part of his daily fun. You do know that surfing is a dangerous and high-risk sport, right?

also hope you can bear watching your guy go out on 10-15-20 foot roaring days while you sit helplessly on the shore with your heart beating louder than the crashing waves, and all you can do is hope and pray he will come out ALIVE.

Mike would rather face this than the dishes.
Despite all that I’ve mentioned above, it really isn’t that bad. Dating guys who surf can be fun, invigorating, and exciting. They’re sexy because of their athleticism and the dangers involved in the sport. Here, you have guys that are highly passionate, driven, and often with a deep love for the sea and nature. They’re easy-going and relaxed at their best, as well as being quite low-maintenance (they pretty much live in boardies). 

It must be said though that surfers revolve their lives around the sport. Their choices of residence, jobs, living conditions, and holiday plans are greatly influenced by the “surf.” So, if you have the tolerance and strength to endure all these and not mind taking a back-seat to their obsession, I mean passion, then go ahead and date one.

Educate yourself on surfing, learn first aid, bring a good book, and keep your patience. Better yet, if you can, learn to surf. This way, dating this crazy breed of guys will be a more fun and less painful experience for you!

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So, Mike couldn't take my article sitting down and wrote a hilarious response based on a surfer's POV. Read it HERE.

59 comments:

  1. This is just a great post that made me laugh and every single bit is true!! Greet one, Lars

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    1. thanks. glad you can relate either way. =)

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    2. Bullshit stereotype crap. You do know girls surf right? Not every woman sits watching her man live life purely to write a shite 'article' later.

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    3. Was waiting for the token feminazi to pipe in...

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    4. I love it!! Sounds like my boyfriend! !!! I surf but only when its not too big as I'm a a scaredy cat... so then im the official photographer! I'm going to start a Facebook page for gos. ... girlfriends of surfers... maybe we can all hang out on the beach together :)

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  2. I actually laugh when I read this 'coz it's so true. lol! I'm dating one, and I'm glad I don't have a problem with it. we both love the ocean and nature, and he teaches me how to surf too. :)

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    1. sounds like a match-made in surf heaven! =)

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  3. HA! Laughed out loud for real a couple of times. You got us nailed down for sure.
    Aloha, RH

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  4. Hahaha Been in all of those situations at least once to a million times and wouldn't have it any other way.

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  5. I never thought I read something like this ever!!! Don't even marry them, shit! Forget movies, forget me first, forget date nights, unless you date him for about a week. If you marry one and then babies who surf, more surftrastum. All they want is surf, surf, surf, surf, food, food, then u must surf as well then sex then surf surf surf. Gifts if you tell what you actually want. Pro surfers are worst. Me Me Me!!!! Then here it's your gift baby. But after all that, reward. They love you forever. At least mine does. The sea creatures of the earth. Surfers. Got to learn how to love them. Actually, he is awesome even if I am third. Meaning surf,kids and me. ;-)

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    1. funny about what you said: "Gifts if you tell what you actually want." because if not, you'll get a surfboard! haha

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    2. I married a girl who loved me and the beach and surfing. We have now been married 29 years. All 4 of our kids surf. My daughter is a pro surfer. My wife managed a surf shop for years and we take vacation to Bali. It was the best life ever and if I could have a do-over, I would pick the same life and she would too because she has told me that herself.

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  6. My wife bitches about the sun going behind the clouds, debt from buying boards, the beach is too cold, I surfed the last two days on and on and on. I tell her well she coulda stayed home, or dated a football watching, pizza eating guy.....but then she wouldn't be going to Bali for a month or living in Hawaii. Is sitting on the beach and pretending like you love it really that hard? How come the hot women that lay out on the beach all day never seem to actually enjoy the beach once you date them? I've found that date night after surfing keeps the peace :)

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    1. haha remember, it's all about time management. goodluck! p.s. strange about women at the beaches not really liking the beach. they probably just need an excuse to weir their new bikinis haha

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  7. This post reminded me that I need to go surfing again soon! I really miss it :)

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  8. I married a hot surf chick after getting dumped by every other non-surfing bitch :)
    Surfing and constant great sex, now thats better.

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  9. Yep, 100 % truth in this article. Might want to add: has trouble keeping a job because he uses up all his sick days and vacation days when its pumping.

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  10. I don't know about teaching your girlfriend how to surf...No one likes a salty beaver..Surfers like there guy time and no one wants a chick hanging out with them even in the water...Trust me on this, I have had two good girlfriends that surfed and its annoying. Guys are dicks and they will burn the girls at times even if the girls are good. Anyways great article but thought I would clarify this last point the author made.

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    1. you're a dick.

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    2. That's pretty much the worst way to say it. Here, let me help you:
      It's not as great when your girlfriend surfs because, since you care for her, you're watching out for her, all the time. All of a sudden, it isn't your alone time, or your bro time, or whatever you want to call it. You spend a lot more time looking out for her, get annoyed when people drop in on her, you try and see if she made it out of the wave ok, if she's ok after she wiped out.
      Yes, having a surfing girlfriend is not what some of us like, because our time-for-ourselves is no longer that. I disagree with that part too. But if you don't realize how you could've offended a girl or two (probably all of them) by how you complained about it, maybe you should try to change the way you talk before finding a new girlfriend.

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    3. i agree with you Anon 6/13 1:51pm.
      not all girls who surf like being baby-sat while surfing either. though yes, it's nice to have your 'surfer other' in the water with you, not all of us aim to disturb their 'surf time.' in fact, i for one, prefer surfing by myself despite my bf's insistence to go with me!

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    4. I don't like babysitting the boys I've surfed with. I'd rather surf alone.

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  11. i think you're right. my hubby can go months without having sex (when i was very pregnant) but can't go 2 weeks without surfing.

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  12. This has to have been written for me! My husband is a die-hard surfer. Can't ever have enough boards, can't ever get enough surf! If there's a wave that's even ankle-high, he's on it! We live in Barbados - two minutes from one of the best breaks, so you could well imagine how many hours he spends in the sea. Bitching aside, it works for us. Someone's gotta love them right?! =)

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  13. Well, written. I think my non-surfing husband might relate. I wear the wet suit in the family.

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    1. awesome! as i always say, we need more women in the line-up. too much testosterone out there...

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  14. Great posting! I totally relate: I used to painfully date a surfer who I later married :))) But I have to say that surfers are better to date than windsurfers: I tried those too!!! it is even worse as you have to go to places where the wind is blowing like crazy all day long. Not fun!

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    1. haha i can imagine how 'breezy' your dates would have been!

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  15. Awesome article when you are sitting at the computer really mad that your surfer husband has booked a week long surfing trip without you or the kids. The waves in El Salvador trump the family. Glad to hear there are others going through the same thing. We have a house at the beach, so he can surf every weekend as well. So it is non-stop online swell checking, dawn patrol and listening to him drone on about the wind. He told me about his surfing when we first started to date, I don't think I really understood that it wasn't merely a hobby. Anyway, thanks for the article and the ability to vent. I am over it now.

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    1. you're welcome. we just have to accept surfing is NOT a hobby. oh no. haha

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  16. Ha I actually laughed a couple times there cause you got us nailed

    Latronic

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  17. This is great! Although you forgot to mention how mad your guy gets when he misses a session~ because when his friends call or text they have to say, "You missed it, it was the best swell of the year!" What's funny about this, is the best swell of the year happens pretty much ALL THE TIME!

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  18. I married a surfer...."Until waves do us part" :/

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  19. Nothing comes between me and the ocean. And my boards. One of them his name is George. Girls, whether you surf or not, your own life is too precious to feel like any sort of sport widow. My wish for you is that you are too damn passionate and excited and happy about your own passions and He has to track you down. <3

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  20. Aw, you still love surfers you can't fool us!

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  21. This summarized me pretty well! Hahahaha

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  22. what about surfer girlfriends thought

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  23. And the only group of men that are actually interested not just in size but in "period"... the other kind of course.

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  24. so true. my last girlfriend broke up because moving away from the ocean was not an option for me.

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  25. I met my husband on the beach, I was 16 - he was 19. We were buds for about 12 years - married 29 yrs. As a kid, it was beach ALL Day (summers) BUT we are totally different. I was never 1 to "wait" around for him, waves etc. I found it boring hearing about surf, waves, more surf etc. Art + music were my thing ~ I was always fiercely independent. I never stood in his way. When the kids came + every Saturday it was, I can't make plans because there may be surf" Well that didn't sit very well.. I didn't put our lives on hold due to the possibility of surf.
    So, I made plans without him. Me + 3 kids (babies) split every Sat. morning, NYC, up state, all over. .. Pretty soon on days with lousy surf, he wanted to do something ~ sorry dude, wifey has plans!! He started getting up 6 AM - hit the beach, be back by 10. Then we would all hang + have fun. Sometimes you may have to out smart the surfer! I never cared about all the boards, surf trips etc. He has traveled the world, I have my own life, I 'm a photographer, have a gallery, zillion friends. We have a great family, a beach house. For (me) us this has worked well. His friends envy him because I allow him freedom ~ it works both ways.

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    1. you're a smart woman to keep on with your own passions instead of conflicting about your difference. keep it up. =D

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  26. You forgot to mention that they never have any money and if you decide to have a kid with one, they too, will become a second or third priority. Immaturity, selfishness, and lack of responsibility! No bueno. No more surfers for me!

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  27. hahahahhah This is sooo true!! I'm married to one and everything on this article is 100% accurate but until this day I wouldn't change him for anything!! I admire him for having such a passion (obsession) with the waves! Because when he has some stress due to work or something else he just need to go to the beach and he always comes back so different and calm! I rather have a surfer that has the waves to soothe their soul than a regular guy that needs women, food or alcohol to chill out and be stress free! So far it has worked very well for us!! I try to go with him to the beach and I try to read a good book, get some tan or just embrace the sun and the sound of the ocean and relax while he is in the water. Sometimes I bother him that when he look at me the way he look at the waves I'm gonna be the happiest woman on earth! LOL But I don't need that because he told me every single day with his actions that I might not be his priority like the beach but I'm the first runner up and Im ok with it because I feel loved and happy with him and I think that it is all that should matters! That each one is happy in their own ways and work better when together! Viva the surfers!!!! :D

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    1. seems like you have embraced your partner's passion wisely. good on you.. wish you continuous happiness! =)

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  28. I thought all this nonsense was over now that I'm older because most guys do chill on their surfing but so many have a second affair with kitesurfing and I've found one of them. I don't know yet if I can do this again. I love all the other activities personally and my goal is to find soomeone to share all that with me. I might use him for sex in the meantime lol

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    1. yeah they'll find the water one way or another.. goodluck and enjoy the sex at least haha =)

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  29. So only guys surf? Your a fucking idiot

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    1. this article is from a surfer's girlfriend's POV. a guideline for non-surfing girls that want to date someone who does as well as females that surf and are dating another surfer.
      READ AGAIN.

      and fyi, I'm a girl and I SURF. a lot. so, who's the idiot now??

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  30. Very well written and so very true:

    "And wait until he gets a new surfboard and it'll be the most important thing in his life. You may even come home to it lying on your bed." - HaHa I had 3 new boards lined up on the double bed.

    Like your site. Your partner is very tall does he ride a shortboard or a Mal?

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    1. they seem comfy on the double b haha
      he often rides shortboards but he enjoys the longboard and has guns for the big days. =)

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  31. I'm so pissed off right now

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  32. Regularly on the off chance that you visit a secured kitesurf shop they will have a portion of the kite supplies prepared for you to undertake the water and demo. By attempting the demo Kitesurf gear they have accessible you can discover which kite and board suits your style.

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